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Miracles- The Clowns Don't Lie.

Let me tell you something.

If you have a whim, humor it.

I'll tell you I'm nearing an unexpected success story, after all this time spent fucking with disaster.

It's like this:

Somebody found the cure for cancer with AIDs. They cancel each other out.

Now the Hospice is going out of business.

It's a fucking miracle- more impressive than any magnet.

So chin up, Heavy Heart, you're going to be just fine.

And if all it goes to Hell, at least we'll both keep warm by brimstone.


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'Hope, you don't have to use it on your wedding night.'

She handed the pistol to Hope, right after the vows, right before the reception.

'I'm just kidding, darling. Don't worry. He's a good man. You did well sweetheart. He's a good man. You'll be fine.'

Hope's paper-thin smile tried to grow as she stared at her grandmother's reflection in the mirror. The mother-of-pearl grip sparkled in her grandmother's hand, bathed by the Chapel's cheap buzzing lights.

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Hope had left the gun on the table.

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In a rare instance of good fortune, her phone ran out of battery before she could indulge her sense of pithy revenge. She woke up and pried open her tear-salted eyelashes then made sure to delete an…