Skip to main content

Another Lucid Dream Fail

For a while now, I've been trying to lucid dream. Somebody told me, and then the internet backed this up, that you can either look at your hands in the dream or look at a clock. Once you do that, you should notice that you either have too many fingers or they're much too long. If you look at a clock, the time should be distorted, either a non-existent time or just a jumble of digital lines.

Well. I had an extremely vivid dream that took place in my neighborhood. I was running late for something because I had overslept and for some reason, a lifeguard from the YMCA took me on a ride to get two DVDs, which cost 23 dollars and turned out to be an itty bitty frame which had the first scene of a movie on the front, and the last scene on the back. This guy had recorded his coworkers, who were dressed in drag from one of those old time photo things. It was a promotional video. I looked at the clock in his car, a digital clock, and it VERY CLEARY READ 6:51. Then a couple minutes later, when I realize that I am too late to even show up to this appointment, and I'm trying to justify my absence to this guy who's driving back to work, the clock reads 6:53. 

So I woke up pretty terrified that I had fucked up my life out of lateness. By all lucid dreaming accounts, I should have looked at the clock and realized that I was in a dream. But the time was extraordinarily real. My hands were normal, no extra digits, no super long fingers. 


Either everybody else is wrong, or I have a specific signal that isn't documented that I now have to ACTIVELY search out in my dream. But... I won't know I'm dreaming... so what am I looking for?

I figure that all the time spent in daydreams has confused my real dreams so they become more mundane and my head can't tell the difference between what I think when I'm awake and what happens when I'm asleep. 

Mark my words, though, I will eventually dream the most lucid dream that has ever been dreamt by the likes of a dreamer. 

If any of you lucid dreamers read this, please give me more advice. 

( This counts as a hobby, fyi. )


  1. heres a couple hints.
    -Try reading a sentence in your dream, it will make sense but you cannot re-read it.

    Every time you flick a light switch, think to yourself, "am I dreaming?"
    Make it a habit. when you do this in a dream, you will notice the difference.

    Last but not least, and this one may be hard Cami, Don't smoke pot before you sleep. makes a difference.

    Your everlasting admirer

  2. BeenThereDreamedThatApril 29, 2011 at 2:22 AM

    Fuck that freaky dude in front of me. This is how you do it.

    Buy it.

    Read about it.

    Use it.
    Thank me later. Oh, and don't listen to the creepy fucker, pot definitely adds to it.

  3. Dont listen to that asshole in front of me.
    this is what you need
    Lucid Dreaming Glasses


Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I Can't Hear Your Little Red Rooster


I call this room Home.

He will not look at me

His eyes flicker with

a speck of violence.

my strained smile,

disgusted by

my pleading eyes.

my veins freeze

icy blood

tearing through coronaries

May Day

'Hope, you don't have to use it on your wedding night.'

She handed the pistol to Hope, right after the vows, right before the reception.

'I'm just kidding, darling. Don't worry. He's a good man. You did well sweetheart. He's a good man. You'll be fine.'

Hope's paper-thin smile tried to grow as she stared at her grandmother's reflection in the mirror. The mother-of-pearl grip sparkled in her grandmother's hand, bathed by the Chapel's cheap buzzing lights.

'There's a bullet for you, just in case.'

Hope had left the gun on the table.

A week earlier, drunk off self-pity, she had taken it out of its case and walked to the kitchen, where she stuck the barrel in her mouth and proceeded to take pictures of herself to send to Ray.

In a rare instance of good fortune, her phone ran out of battery before she could indulge her sense of pithy revenge. She woke up and pried open her tear-salted eyelashes then made sure to delete an…