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Paradoxical Bitch.

You know it's funny to me, especially after I plaster pictures of myself frolicking in my underwear, that I should be so illogically chaste.


I won't tell you how long it's been. (But it's been months.) I just can't seem to slut around, so I guess that's why I have to manifest sexy without sex. But man when it comes around.... psh... that's going to be some sexy sex.


You all don't believe me, I wouldn't either, but the truth is stranger than fiction. On the inside, I'm sweet and fat and old and matronly, but I can't help that my outside brings out the devil in men.

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