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twilight, and its absolutely awful consequences.

I'm trying to look back at fads

and nothing seems as god-awful as twilight. I will not even give it the dignity of being capitalized.

I've written about this before, but now I'm telling you that we have to fix this damage. Before countless catastrophic deaths overcome our society, deaths caused by wanna-be vampire psychopaths, who accidentally hit their love's jugular with their plastic hot-topic fangs.

It's different when adults escape into a fantasy world; it's more necessary when you're an adult, and you are usually, though there's always entertaining exceptions to this rule, more or less aware of it as an escape and not designated by your usual reality.

Young kids though, especially awkward ones and there are so so many, will not be able to tell the difference. And when you fuel awkwardness with hormones, you're just going to get more weird. They can't adjust well as adults, not when they live in a world where true mormon love is a myth. Because eventually, something will knock them on their ass and in the face of reality.

I mean come on...what's going to happen when the pale goth kid fucks the pale goth girl and doesn't call the next day? She's probably going to kill herself. These kids are sensitive; telling them vampire-human love doesn't exist, except in that socio-pathic kind of way, is like murdering all their weird fantasies. You have to distract them.

With what? With... anything but that. Jingle your keys at them or something, I don't know...get them hooked on phonics.


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