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The Truth is, I hate Dolphins

Yes. It's true.

I hate dolphins.

And let me tell you why.


Dolphins are manipulative animals.

They are as smart as stupid girls who are pretty

And who have large breasts so naturally, like dolphins,

They will manipulate.


They are too smart and too well liked.

You know dolphins are fucked up.


They get jealous you know. Of their own kids.

Look it up. I saw it in a newspaper once.


A cat now, a cat is adorable.

But not so smart. Smart

But not so smart as an adorable dolphin.


I get it. I get it.


I don't like it. I don't like dolphins.


And if you like dolphins,

Well..I don't know what I'm going to think of you.


It's not that I want to kill all the dolphins,

It's just that dolphin tracksuits are all the rage.


The only thing I stand by in life,

Is my all consuming hate for dolphins.

All of them. Every last dolphin that ever swam.


Flip off Flipper.

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