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America Lost a Powerful Role Model, Allow Me to Take Her Place

So Miley Cyrus doesn't want to be your kid's role model. 


I read some article on Cnn.com and she said it wasn't her job.


So little girls, you have to let the dream die. No more pole dancing unless it's a job. No more sexy myspace pictures unless it's a job. And it will be. Once I get through with you.


Now embrace The Nightmare!


I think I would make a tremendous role model for your daughters.


I can train them to listen. With positive reinforcement for any and every wavering of confidence


Because a good woman is a quiet woman. A strong woman is a man. And a man can't marry a man.  Ain't no room for the gays in my America goddamnit.


Learn from my mistakes, little girls. 

I can teach you how to put on eyeliner and walk in heels. 


Miley Cyrus hasn't figured herself out yet.


I HAVE. So I now assume that position. 


If I had a flag I would pitch it on her ass but I don't so I won't. 

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